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Disability:
The invalid is a parasite on society. In a certain state it is indecent to go on living. To vegetate
on in cowardly dependence on physicians and medicaments after the meaning of life, the right to life, has been lost ought to entail the profound contempt of society.

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 He&She Marriage Bureau for Disabled

  Where Hope Begins... and your dreams come true.    Free Online Service 
 

   For Pakistan onl y     
 

We are pioneer in Pakistan, providing free online matrimonial services to PWDs

Since Jan 2007

Just because you are in a wheelchair doesn't mean you can't enjoy the variety of life.       

Free Registration

Note: Marriage Service has been terminated permanently. Sorry!

Project started on January 01, 2007 and closed on August 14, 2016

 

Success Stories...

Just because you are in a wheelchair doesn't mean,
you can't enjoy the variety of life.

  Success is not to do great things all the time but to do things in a great way. 

 


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My heart beats with her
Shared by: ajmalbeig  send him a message
Lahore. Pakistan.

Click picture to enlarge

ajmalbeigIt was a miserable hot Sunday of April 12, 1970, in Lahore, Pakistan when I got fractured my cervical spine in the shallow water of Lahore city canal. As I dived, my head hit the sand; legs poled up over my head and then fell down to right side. After a moment, I felt that water is running over me. I tried my best to come up but there was neither sensation nor any movement in my body. So I believed to be drowned and dead but a sparkling wish waved in my mind for the life. I prayed to God Almighty for an escape and suddenly a vortex swirled me back to the bank. I was in full senses but totally motionless. Some people noticed me and get me out of water. All this happened within seconds. After some time, I was taken to Services Hospital by a horse-driven tonga and shifted to Mayo Hospital late at night. At then, I was just 16, have passed my Secondary School Examination in 1st division and in a process to getting admission in a college.

Next, it's a shocking zig-zag story, yet hard to recall and maybe unpleasant to read. But let me brief it to show the degree of my inconveniences while in bed. In Mayo Hospital Lahore, I was diagnosed as "burst fracture of C-5" and a group of senior doctors headed by Dr. Sardar Ali Sheikh unanimously decided to apply fish-hooks’ traction. Next day, I was taken to Operation Theater where Dr. Ghazanfar Ali Shah made holes in my sideburns and attached fish-hooks there, and a weight of 15 pounds was imposed to traction for 12 weeks. I spent first four months in a state of motionless body... no sensations… semi-consciousness... highest 107.2°F temperature... painful fish-hook cervical traction... neurogenic bladder and profound bedsores. After improving some sensations and perceptions, I was shifted to General Hospital Lahore for the recovery of my bedsores. So, I spent next eight months there until my bedsores completely healed. And when I moved back to home after almost a year, a new era began to fight for life and struggle to chalk out my future. Great efforts for the restoration of my health and ability to walk back were made. All available health specialists and peers were contacted. A variety of treatments i.e Allopathy, Homeopathy, Herbal, Hydropathy, and Spiritual were practiced but time elapsed faster and faster without a certain miracle. Thus, days accumulated to months and months made up years. However, after a constant period of 2½ years, while using mix treatments and performing physiotherapy, I was somehow developed to stand and walk with the help of crutches first and with a high stick later. My sensations were also restored partially and I was categorized to "Left-sided hemi-plegic".

In 1974, I was operated twice. First, my urinary bladder was operated for a stone removal. The famous urologist Dr. Imtiaz of Hajrah Memorial Clinic did a successful attempt. Second, for the rectification of my spinal cord - decompression by laminectomy, famous neurologist of that time Prof. Dr. Bashir Ahmed did the operation after a great discussion which was severely unsuccessful. My sensations diminished and I lost my ability to walk even with crutches. My capacity of writing weakened as severely that I was unable to even holding my pen. Thus, this futile operation badly affected my daily routines and I was somehow more dependent than before. To restore my pre-operative condition, several certain efforts were made with the help of physiotherapy but I couldn’t walk with crutches even after and now, a permanent wheelchair user. My latest cervical spine MRI report concludes; Post traumatic C5 compression and cord injury which has progressed to focal cord atrophy and mylomalacia.

As I grew up, my emotional attitude stricken by sudden loneliness. I need someone to talk and share my feelings with but there were no certain opportunities to avail to. In 1980, I attended an out-stationed marriage ceremony among other relatives and traveled by train. My first cousin, who was accompanying us, observed the facts, difficulties and degree of my disability very closely. In her own words, "It was first time; I felt a soft corner for someone in my heart." She doesn’t express her feelings to me and we came back without any emotional incident rather spent a pleasure time among families. After a few months, we were gathered again in a local marriage ceremony and she conceived same feelings once again. Again, in her own words, "this instance was a milestone for me to decide that I will share your sorrows and spend my life with you. I felt, I was pushing towards you by a vital force magnetically. I believe; God revealed me to do that."

After a few months, (first time in her life) she approached to my house all alone and acknowledged her feelings in a daring manner. I was shocked and hard to believe because I was totally ignorant about her two repetitive mindsets. In later months, we correspond often and she visited me frequently to better understand each other. It gave us courage and spirit and at last leads us to decide to marry. Before any extreme action, my father visited her father for a favour but he refused as we were expected. Thus, using our legal right of self-determination was our last option and with the court orders, we have our nikah on December 20, 1981.

On December 29, 1981, I was invited to read a paper about disability and its consequences; entitled “Kiya Mazoori Aik Roag Hai?” in a seminar; conducted in relevance to “1981-International Year for the Disabled Persons” embraced by the United Nations; well-echoed globally and observed in Pakistan as well on broad spectrum. The seminar was organized at Hotel Flatti's, Lahore under the banner of Anjuman-e-Bahali-e-Mazooran, Lahore; headed by Mr. Jamshaid Pirzada and presided over by Mr. Zakir Hussain Qureshi Provincial Minister for Social Welfare and Religious Affairs, Punjab. After my speech, a handicapped lady Mrs. Mussarat Piracha asked about my activities. As I replied, “I’m free at home”, she said, "A person with such brilliant vision and feelings, must not stay idle at home".She offered me to work with her in a Girls High School she was running since long. Being grateful to Almighty Allah , I accepted her offer and joined the office with great enthusiasm and passion on January 4, 1982 as PRO (Public Relation Officer). The lady provided me a wheelchair as gift to use at home which brought great comfort to my life. My younger brothers were responsible to pick and drop me from home to office in a hand-driven tri-cycle which I was accustomed to use since last three years. Of course, they paid their duty very honestly and with great favour, for that I always have great respect and love for them. As far as my service is concerned, I believed; my nikah opened a new door of fortune to me.

Next year, in August 1982, we got married as my in-laws agreed upon “rukhsati” in a blessing manner and I brought my wife to my little paradise filled with love, harmony, and hope. In the later years, we struggled a lot for our better living and brighter future by understanding and accommodating each other. We mutually played a considerable role to cope with ups and downs and never loose our courage and faith. There were so many instances that shook our courage but we remain in the arena, sharing our regrets and pleasures among ourselves. With our performance, spirit, and passion for life we become flourishing and independent year after year. We furnished our home with household facilities that make our life easy. Later, I got patient lifter, new wheelchair and tri-wheeler auto motorcycle that brings a lot of comfort to our life as we were more independent and able to enjoy our life, the way we like.

Alhamdo Lillah, we are spending a satisfied and happy matrimonial life with a live example for the society. Despite, we are still childless; she never let me think about my disability. I believe she is the "best of all the best" in the world and the most wonderful girl on earth. If there are women who have privilege to claim Jannah with their good deeds, my wife is one of them. She is always supporting, loving, caring and compromising and no doubt she makes my life a paradise on this earth! She is a symbol of love, courage, compromise and sacrifice. In August 2007, we have celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary (silver jubilee) with great pride. Read an Urdu article about Mazoori Aur Shadi

My literary thirst well quenched at school platform, where I done a great creative work. I introduced my unseen artistic qualities; textual to designing by giving extra time even after school hours. While I got computer training well beside my service in late afternoons, my medical problem get worse and worst due to constant sittings; resulting pressure sores. At last, in the capacity of Manager, I resigned heavy-heartily on medical grounds after a continuous service of 18+ years without claiming any retirement benefits. Now with the mercy of God, I’m running my own home-based computer training institute with full capacity and all of my multi-natured activities are focused on it. With great pride, I’m providing state-of-the-art and unmatchable professional training facilities and discounts to PWDs (Persons With Disabilities) with wheelchair access at my Pentium Graphics Center & Training Institute, located at Sanda Kalan, Lahore, Pakistan.

In the field of literature and passion to work for the rehabilitation of PWDs, currently I'm engaged whole heartily with following two projects:

  1. Working for "Voice of Specials" - a bi-lingual monthly magazine (ABC Certified) publishing from Lahore for PWDs by the PWDs in the capacity of Executive Editor (Hon). In good sense, to promote the voice of PWDs and highlight their problems on a broad spectrum, I have designed and sponsored the official website of Voice of Specials.

  2. Addressing the most neglected issue - the marriage of the PWDs, I'm offering free online matrimonial service for PWDs with the association of my wife and a group of  sincere people. We also offer counseling, guidelines and aid-in-material, where needed. We encourage normal persons in getting married with PWDs. Online registration is totally free and there are no hidden charges before or after marriage. If you are a PWD, you still have the right in getting married. Register yourself and see our listings at He&She Online Marriage Bureau for Disabled.

at holy kaabaMore exclusively, in April-May 2008, I have got honoured to perform Umrah with my wife. This spiritual journey and stay in the Holy Lands of Makkah and Madinah (in Saudi Arabia) brings me peace, happiness, satisfaction of mind and empowered my eemaan. Al-hamdo Lillah. To share my experiences and observance with rest of the world, specially with Muslim PWDs,  I have documented each and everything and now available online. You can read this travel story with cross info, pictures, and guidelines for PWDs planning for Umrah. Read and enjoy... click here to proceed

This success story has been shared at Disabled World and listed here, you can read it here

 

…once a person overcomes a disability through his own courage, determination and hard work, he has a depth of spirit you and I know little about…. This is a branch of medicine in which the patient has more power than the doctor in setting the limits and possibilities…” (The Father of Rehabilitation, Dr. Howard Rusk)

  Let's help someone who is not as fortunate as we are! 

The Thought-provoking story of “ajmalbeig” is a reflection of true spirited life in this mortal world. Anyone who has ever wished to live in it for ever, met with a tragic end. This life has never been sincere to anyone but cruel. I think the life of the couple is beyond appreciation. ……The Couple did not get disappointed at any stage and very bravely confronted the adverse circumstances with dignity and pride….And I must here forget not to mention his praise-worthy and devoted wife who sacrificed her entire life for a noble cause. Imagine, once she must have been a young college going girl, filled with sweet dreams of life…..She must also had thought of traveling around……Must had wished to live like a normal human beings. Imagine, how many times she must have re-called his decision of getting married with a disable person…….How many times she must has thought about the justification of this decision she took….. How many times she might have been broken from inside, seeing the outer world…..She must also had dreams, emotions, feelings and desires about life……..BUT, nevertheless’ she sacrificed everything for WHAT…….for a noble cause. And I think such woman with sound character and noble cause is beyond appreciation and praise.  I really do not find appropriate words to explain her sincerity and sense of sacrifice, though its very hard and difficult to express. I believe that this couple is a role model for the entire humanity. They have not lived this life, rather I would way that they have truly struggled hard to reach at this stage with utmost dedication and courage. I pray that the couple may live long and Almighty may bless them with His countless favours and bounties and may ease their hurdles and worries in the noble cause, they are working for. I wish them a very happy ends of the life to come and hereafter.

With lots of prays and regards...
Saeed Akhtar
Mandi Baha-ud-Din, Pakistan.
October 5, 2007.

 
If you are already married and enjoying a satisfied life, share your success story with others to motivate and encourage them.